Everyone has one of these... 'A favourite list'

It's all got a bit silly recently. The summer keeps threatening to come... it did this week. Briefly. But then it went away again. The left and the right got into bed together and (if you believe the press), are 'happy bed-fellows'. Blur got back together to announce a tour. I might have just made that up though...

Anyway, the title of this piece of prose. I thought I would bang out one of these because, well I don't know do I? Perhaps I'm bored...

Book: Three Men in a Boat - Jerome K. Jerome
Film: Roman Holiday
TV: Histories/Sport
Sport: Cycling/Horse Racing
Colour: Gotta be red
Drink: Black coffee
Food: Meat
Music: Interpol/Pixies/Ennio Morricone but it really depends on what day it is...

And that's enough of that. Bored yet?

Roll up! Roll up! It's the austere Olympics...

Well they've gone and done it! The Olympics or the 'Games of the XXX Olympiad' to give it's proper name, is being turned into a sideshow. This morning it was announced that the budget will be cut by £27million. The current Government were always going to impose spending cuts when you consider the state of the economy and government debt left after the disasterous Labour Government. But the Olympics? They could have left this alone... couldn't they?

With budget cuts coming so soon before the Games actually take place, I just hope this has been thoroughly thought through... right to the final and future conclusion. That is, that if the 2012 Games take place with the appearance of being... cheap, we may never get to host them again.

So where should the cuts start? Obviously they'll be fiscal and the shortfall in money will come from elsewhere. But what if it doesn't? If cuts to the budget are inevitable - and it seems they are coming, maybe everything 'Olympic' should be cut? Here are some thoughts...

Gold, Silver and Bronze medals? Old hat. How about Tin, Iron and a Chocolate egg. You decide which medal each should replace.

The 80m Sprint.

The Double Jump.

Men's Octathlon.

The Short Jump.

I don't agree with cuts to the Olympic budget. It should be an honour to host them; whatever the cost. And in that lies the problem. Other countries who were disappointed at not being awarded the 2012 Olympics may be counting their blessings now, considering the recent global recession. If 'we' get this wrong... 'we'll' all have egg on our face. And it won't be made of chocolate.

What? The furniture is too heavy? Get ice cream...

This weather is brilliant! Apparently we are already about 6 degrees above average. And for the third day in a row... with not a cloud in sight, we are stuck in the mid-twenties. Which in old money is about 78 fahrenheit...

The sky is a brilliant blue with nothing in it but aeroplanes...

But there is a downside... the grass grows at a million miles an hour and almost constantly looks like it hasn't been cut properly. I ignore the grass situation and look for a nice, easy job in the house... you have to be careful in what you do in all this heat! So why do I find myself moving heavy furniture about the house? How did this happen? What possessed me to think that today was the day that this needed doing? I must be missing something...

In situations like this... only one of two things will work. A fork-lift truck... it doesn't fit in the house. The second thing however, does fit in the house. And it's called iced-cream.

News Flash: Britain to host the Olympic Games... Great idea. Bad design?

It's the year 2010 and the summer is just about to really kick in. Brilliant! So that leaves only two summers before we play host the 'Greatest Show on Earth'... and I am not talking about the Russian State Circus, which I'm sure, is quite good...

Nope! I am referring to the Summer Olympics. For the first time in more than fifty years, Britain has been entrusted with this very precious jewel. They are coming to London and some of the events will be hosted just down the 'street' from where I live. Hooray! We will host the Olympics - the first time since 1948 - and we, as a nation, will be thrust into the spotlight. But is this such a good idea?

I suppose it depends what your goals are... or maybe what they should be? There will be a few people (or maybe a lot of people) who's goal will be to get rich taking money from the tourists by selling bits of  'junk' memorabilia. And where will these tourists stay, eat and drink? The hotels will be booked to capacity... you won't be able to get a table in an Indian or Chinese restaurant for weeks... the bars will be fully... er, full. Along the way others may reach their own goals and win an event (rowing and cycling are my fancies). But will we be able to give out any medals? Let us not forget... We are skint! The money side of these games, I hope will be sorted at a later date. (Presumably and hopefully after the games. Could we be seen to be hosting these games on a shoestring? If we do that we will never, ever be awarded the games again...)

But before the games have even begun some winners are already starting to emerge... The guy's or gal's who designed the 2012 logo. A design company (I'm guessing here), was paid a lot of money to come up with that. It looks like the sort of graffiti you'd see in a New York train tunnel circa 1983. So maybe New York should have played host? I'm not saying London is as clean as Paris but come on! Couldn't we have done any better than that?

But the absolute cherry on the cake for me was unveiled earlier this afternoon. Today saw the launch of the London 2012 mascots, Wenlock and Mandeville. Apparently they are blobs of molten metal that fell of the main stadium. They were 'based' on designs by children... presumably so the highly paid individual (I'm guessing again here...), who finalised the design will have some sort of plausible denial. Time to 'man up' folks! Who is running the show here? And who thought crotchless underwear was somehow appropriate? That was just genius...

Here take a look...

Whether we operate with a reduced budget or not. If we do manage to find some medals to give out. We really needn't worry. If we start to cut the money too much before we even get to 27th July 2012, we'll already be a laughing stock. And the people laughing loudest will be logo and mascot designers... because they will have already been paid.

So summer is coming which means (I guess?), cricket...

After the weekend... (when finally, absolutely, definitely... England won a worldwide recognised cricket trophy), I've only just got the spring back in my step...

I have struggled all day. And I blame it all on the game of cricket. Never did such a mundane game command so much attention or so much alcohol. I thought I had cured myself of cricket a long time ago...

Me: 'Cricket is boring... dull...whatever...' (or words to that effect...)

Dad: 'No you can't turn the TV over. Dull as he is...I wanna listen to Geoff...'

I didn't realise that at the time he was talking about Geoff Boycott. Actually SIR Geoff Boycott. Knighted for being... Yorkshire. Or something. What?! Nevertheless, it would appear that as you get older... cricket looms larger.

I went to a car rally yesterday. I was really looking forward to it as well. And for all of the right reasons too... old relics... carefully bought back to life... with love. And all that engineering! But I arrive and within 10 minutes what happens? It starts to chuck it down with rain... So what did I do? I went home and watched the cricket. Looking like an an old relic. The irony.

Like the countless times my dad was telling me why I wasn't about to switch Geoff off. Like me trying to explain to the uninitiated 'how cricket works'...  I simply gave in, admitted defeat and went home. And I am so glad I did. Because we are World Champions. And we don't get to say that often enough.

As for being cured of cricket. I play on the 30th...

Just a little quickie...

T'is Friday! Hoorah! And I for one am really looking forward to the weekend. Dunno how I'll be spending it but there will be certain conditions attached to it.

In no particular order...

1. The sun will shine. A lot.
2. No driving.

There...another blog. Wonder if anybody gonna read it?

Laughing all the way to the cabinet...

We have a new Prime Minister! We have a new Prime Minister! And soon we'll be getting a new voting system! And soon we'll have a new way of doing politics. And soon we'll have presidential style elections! And soon we'll be the 51st state! And soon we'll be getting... I think I'll stop there.

The 'people' have spoken and they want a new voting system. Rather unsurprisingly, one of the few 'people' to publicly state they wanted a new voting system were the Liberal Democrats and only 57 of them got elected... Not being cynical, just sticking to the facts.

Just exactly how many concessions did David Cameron and the Conservatives need to give away to ensure a majority? Concessions that were given to a third rate, THIRD PLACED party. I guess we'll find out in the next few days/weeks. So Clegg's tarting seems to have paid off... and good luck to him. Can't wait to see the fine detail of this... 'deal'.

On a cheerier note. Do you like the new curtains? I do!

Coffee please. It's been a long couple of weeks...

When second and third are first, it's time to step aside...

The Conservatives did urge us to 'Vote for change' and it seems some people did. Only the Conservatives, who polled the most in the popular vote and won more seats than any other party look like being excluded from government.

The Liberals had as their campaign slogan 'Change that works for you'... shouldn't that read 'Change that works for them'?

Labour for their part had 'A future fair for all'. Doesn't seem very fair to me...

Today is the fifth day of the what could be the longest, 'last dance at a school disco' in history. So the leader of the Liberal Democrats, Nick Clegg (it would appear), is the darling of Downing Street and the Labour Party. Not bad for parties third and second respectively...

Clegg is perfectly placed to be Kingmaker. But will he be hoisted by his own petard when these coalition allies turn on him? Because they will. And what of his own party? What do they think of all this political toing and froing? Dashing from meeting to meeting? Won't this just wind people up to a point that when he does begin to speak, nobody will be listening?

And what of David Cameron and the Conservatives? Like the guy at the school disco with no one to dance with; they are looking more and more as if they'll have nothing left to do but go home. Alone. And I think this is exactly what they should do. This is a 'hung parliament' don't forget and as the saying goes 'Give a man enough rope...'. Brown did the only decent thing left to him yesterday and fell on his own sword and I am guessing that pressure will be mounting now for Clegg to do something, anything that will at least bring closure to this mess.

The Conservatives should leave the negotiations and say no more, watch the fun from the opposition benches in the full knowledge that you did not lose site of the politics that almost got you elected and that in the long term, coalitions don't work anyway. Vote for change? I cannot wait.

And the unlucky winner is...

Isn't this all getting a bit boring? It has been four days now and still the 'smoke-filled, backroom deals' continue... (not my words). And all the while the Dark Lord (Mandelson) moves among us...

So the Liberal Democrats (23% of the popular poll) are in conference with the majority holding Conservatives (36.1%). A majority, albeit not an overall one. In the wings, Labour 'wait' to leap into action if the Liberal Democrat/Conservative talks break down. (A Labour party that only got 29% of the popular vote).

If the talks break down with the Conservatives; and the Liberal Democrats do accept the offer of working with the current Labour Government... wouldn't this just smack of the Liberals Democrats just going for the highest bid and grabbing all they can get? That's not really setting an example of 'let's clean up politics' in my opinion. Coming so close after the 'expenses scandal' and appearing to totally ignore the results of a legitimate election.

Could this 'ill-considered' stance, in view of what Nick Clegg said after the results were in last week be dangerously close to the death knell for the Liberals Democrats? Who after all, haven't been elected for almost a century and who pride themselves on wanting proportional representation but who now find themselves in a position where they alone get to decide who'll be in charge? Hardly proportional...

In my view nobody wins. Certainly not the voters... 77% didn't want the Liberal Democrats. 71% didn't want Labour. But this is what we might end up with... (for balance 63% of the voters didn't want the Conservatives). But a Liberal Democrat/Labour et al coalition would be in power. So maybe Labour win (along with all the other 'losers'). Not so sure democracy does...

Whoever gets the keys to Number 10, I think another election should be held within the next 12 months. Otherwise, the Liberal Democrats are in a win/win situation and get to decide who runs the country while getting to influence policy. Directly. From third place!

Whichever parties get to form the next government; won't it seem to the wider public to have been decided in committee? So where is the democracy in that?

When all is said and done... the Conservatives won, so they should govern. Think about it! The election has been called 'the race for Number 10'... at the Olympics people remember the winners. Rarely do they remember the 'also-rans'. Some people might not like that, but it'll be what some people want.

It's an election Jim... but not as we know it.

Well this is interesting. A 'hung' parliament. And not very well hung at that. The Conservatives won more seats, polled more votes yet it is really the 'third man' who gets to say who governs. We are all still waiting. And in the meantime, we still have that sad, deluded man in Number 10... and who is Jim anyway?

My first 'all-nighter' (for an election anyway), and it was all for nothing. Still no majority. Still no answers. And worst of all, no hangover! (Does Gordon count as a hangover?)

My views... Conservative minority government and another election in 9 months time. Get your money on folks!

Oh! And Workforce will win the Derby.

It's the quiet life for me... temporarily.

It's all gone quiet the last few days. After getting steamed up somewhat over the rather bland electioneering that has been going on, things have settled more or less, to a crawl...

But that said, it has been a busy few weeks so maybe the crawl would be just what the doctor ordered. I mean, moving house is never just a case of changing the place where you live is it? It is much more than that... I am still coming up with people and places that I need to get in touch with to tell them I'm not there anymore... So now I am still unpacking boxes. Still looking for stuff. Still saying I am never, ever moving again. Ever.

But it could be worse... I decided to move because, amongst other things I wanted a change. Gordon Brown will be moving next week... with luck and not by choice either. He'll be moving because other people want a change. Normally I wouldn't wish the stress involved in moving house on anyone. But for him? I'm prepared to make an exception.